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NJ Wedding : How much cash to give?

October 5th, 2012 at 03:23 pm

Ok, so my husband and I were married roughly 6 years ago. I remember people giving around 50-75 cash a person. I know it sounds tacky to want to figure out the exact amount to give to my cousin and his fiance, but I don't want to appear stingy. It should be based on what we can afford and our relationship with these people, but somehow it ends up being different than that.

The venue is a swanky place in Jersey, and my husband, 2 year old daughter and I will be attending the reception. What sounds like a reasonable amount to give?

A friend of mine suggested $300, but I was thinking more in the 150 range. Should I count my daughter as a 3rd person (not sure if she is getting her own meal or not) and make it 225? I've asked my mom but she keeps saying 100 is enough for all of us and I don't agree. I'm so bad at these things -- help!!

10 Responses to “NJ Wedding : How much cash to give?”

  1. NJDebbie Says:
    1349447195

    I think $150 is appropriate!

  2. creditcardfree Says:
    1349447544

    I agree with your mom...$100 is enough! I've never even heard about the amount to give based on per person. I'm shocked by this.

  3. guppy Says:
    1349447805

    Thanks for the suggestions!

    Yeah, I get it may look a little bonkers. I currently live in eastern PA and even here my friends don't understand how things work in jersey (or maybe it's just my family in jersey haha). It's almost an unwritten rule that you need to cover the cost of your plate and then some.

  4. pretty cheap jewelry Says:
    1349447851

    Oy, I'm with your mom. And a 2-yr old does not count as a full person!!! Even the airlines let them fly free.

  5. CB in the City Says:
    1349448970

    I think $100 is fine.

  6. Wino Says:
    1349457046

    Another two votes for $100 (DW is here reading with me).

  7. patientsaver Says:
    1349473288

    I was born and raised in NJ and I never heard of basing a wedding gift on anything other than what you want to give and can afford, and what presumably covers the cost of the meal.

  8. patientsaver Says:
    1349473311


    PS $100 or $150 is plenty!!

  9. wowitsawonderfullife Says:
    1349743431

    My understanding is that you pay for your plate (the cost of your dinner). I wouldn't pay for your child, but I would pay $100 per person so $200 minimum. I think that's standard in Ontario Canada.

  10. Jerry Says:
    1350293933

    I think that it is appropriate to give what you can honestly afford. If that leads to a total of $100, then by golly, it's a hundred bucks. If it's $1000, and you want to give them that much, then hot diggity, go for it. People are all in different financial circumstances, and there is no insurance that everyone can afford the same amount!
    Jerry

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