Age difference between siblings

February 5th, 2013 at 07:45 pm

G is 2 years and 4 months. I'm 28 and T is 30.

What age difference is between your children? (or you and your siblings?) I know there is no *right* answer, just wondering about other's thoughts.

We were waiting concerning trying for another kid until our debts were paid. So maybe August 2013? Assuming it takes 6 months, G could end up being almost 4 years older than her sibling.

I've never had an issue with this since my brother and I are 6 years apart and I feel reasonably close to him. We don't talk all the time but we're there for each other when we need it. T on the other hand is only 16 months apart from his sister and in the last 13 years I've known him they've never been close. I think it's more personality than age difference but who knows.

Something to mull over at least..

Posted in Uncategorized | 21 Comments »

21 Responses to “Age difference between siblings”

laura Says:
February 5th, 2013 at 08:11 pm 1360095092
1360095092

DH is only child. I have one sib 4.5 years younger, not much in common with him; we're friendly but in different stations in life. My kids are:
Girl
12 month gap
Girl
3 year gap
Boy
18 month gap
Boy
15 month gap
Boy
So that was five surviving children (would have been six had we not had a difficult loss in the three year gap) There were also several miscarriages, and we hope to adopt, but our youngest is already eight, so I'd ideally like a sibling group (younger than 3).

Good luck!

So that is five kids in
laura Says:
February 5th, 2013 at 08:12 pm 1360095135
1360095135

DH is only child. I have one sib 4.5 years younger, not much in common with him; we're friendly but in different stations in life. My kids are:
Girl
12 month gap
Girl
3 year gap
Boy
18 month gap
Boy
15 month gap
Boy
So that was five surviving children in seven (would have been six had we not had a difficult loss in the three year gap) There were also several miscarriages, and we hope to adopt, but our youngest is already eight, so I'd ideally like a sibling group (younger than 3).

Good luck!

So that is five kids in
sweetlady2k Says:
February 5th, 2013 at 08:19 pm 1360095558
1360095558

I am the oldest(37) and I have a brother 4 yrs younger and a sister 6 years younger. I did play with my brother when we were smaller like my ages 6-11 his was 2-7 I don't remember playing with my sister at all. Around age 12 I had to watch them after school and summers. I did not like or play with them at all. I didn't actually enjoy either of them again until the were in high school. I am close too my brother but not my sister but that is based on her personality not age although age probably had something to do with it at first. My dd is 16 and son is 8. She is somewhat nicer than I was but still interacts with him fairly well considering the age difference. My son does always say he wishes he had someone his size to play with at home. I told him he will have friends come over when he's older just like his sister does. My brother has a 10 y.o. girl and a 8 y.o. boy and they fight alot. Alot of it is personality but a big gap does have obstacles that are just there regarding interests that conflict or not much in common.
North Georgia Gal Says:
February 5th, 2013 at 08:37 pm 1360096636
1360096636

My kids are 4.5 years apart and they are very close. There have been times when they were mad at each other but I think that is normal.
ceejay74 Says:
February 5th, 2013 at 08:44 pm 1360097093
1360097093

Just over 2 years between our kids. Hard to tell how close they'll be, since they're less than 1 and 3 years old, but so far they seem interested in each other.

I'm the baby of my family, and there was a 10-year gap between me and my "youngest" sibling. My 3 sisters were 3 years apart from one another and pretty close friends. My brother was 4 years older than the oldest girl and he's not very close to the rest of us.

I get along great with my sisters; they have each been involved in my life at different times. The oldest was like a second mother to me, and the other two were great advisers when I was in my awkward pubescent and maturing phases. Still, I do sometimes wonder if I'd have a closer relationship if we were closer in age.

Then again, my husband and his sister are only 2 or 3 years apart and aren't terribly close; they get along, but don't go out of their way to speak very often or anything. Apparently they have a better relationship now than when they were younger and actually lived together!
PNW Mom Says:
February 5th, 2013 at 08:48 pm 1360097290
1360097290

My 2 siblings and I are all 2 1/2 years apart...my 2 girls are 3 3/4 years apart and they are very close.
creditcardfree Says:
February 5th, 2013 at 08:50 pm 1360097427
1360097427

My sister and I are only 14 months apart and very close...wish we lived in the same city! My girls are 3 years 3 months apart. They are close at times, but other times they are so different in their ages that they aren't if that makes sense.

My husband is one of 7...he's number 5. All about 2 years apart, plus or minus a few months. He is closest two his two younger sisters. His brother are 4+ years apart and get along, but not very close.
NJDebbie Says:
February 5th, 2013 at 09:57 pm 1360101452
1360101452

My sons are 3 years and 9 months apart. Growing up they were not as close, but now as young adults, they are best friends.
mjrube94 Says:
February 5th, 2013 at 10:07 pm 1360102072
1360102072

I agree it depends on personality. I'm the youngest of 10. The first 9 in 15 years (bless my mother!) then me 5 years later. Looking across the family, everyone is close with someone, and it's not necessarily age-related. I'm sure whatever you decide will work out well!
wowitsawonderfullife Says:
February 6th, 2013 at 12:17 am 1360109847
1360109847

My boys are 7 years apart. They are very close. I think it was the right decision for us as we had a 7 years old when the wee one was born and it was just a great balance. And it's nice to have a few years between them so than we've finished paying for one university degree and we can work on the next one. Works for me!
M E 2 Says:
February 6th, 2013 at 03:00 am 1360119637
1360119637

I am a year older than my sister who is 4 years older than our brother who is 18 months older than our sister. Therefore, my mom (and dad, lol) had 4 kids in 6.5 years.
MonkeyMama Says:
February 6th, 2013 at 03:13 am 1360120439
1360120439

I *love* having boys 2 years apart, but my MIL notes that her 2 children/opposite sex, were never close. BUT ask me again in 10+ years. LOL. I don't think anyone in our family is so close in age/same sex. I suppose my MIL - she had a twin and another sister close in age. I should ask her about that. I wonder if there will be stealing of girlfriends and stuff like that. ?? I can see potential for drama. At age 8/10, my boys dream of living communally with their future wives and children. IT is very cute. I do worry sometimes we don't help since they pool all their money together for toys and stuff like that (won't be like that in the real world?). But I will say they will get along with others, and practice lots of team work. Would prepare them for marriage and working skills...

I also don't think anyone in our families were so close in age for college - I suppose my spouse was 2 years apart in school years, though 3 years apart in calendar years. He was born just after the cutoff/his sister just before. I may luck out because eldest will likely graduate early (though mostly that freaks me out financially). I am more set on "you guys can go to community college years 1 & 2" probably because of their closeness in age. Is not a huge big deal because college is generally pretty inexpensive where we live. AND having a built-in roommate sounds pretty sweet to me. IF they still like each other and actually go to school in the same vicinity - which who knows...

Beyond all that, I don't think most people I know and in our family had kids when we wanted. I can't say having our kids so close in age was our first choice, but we had an "ideal age range" and started on the early side, just a hoping! I am not sure I would have been so gung ho if I knew I'd get pregnant right away, to term and everything. But I do like the way it turned out - was just best for us. & sometimes things turn out "best" when they don't go your way, it seems.
LuckyRobin Says:
February 6th, 2013 at 04:26 am 1360124798
1360124798

I think it all comes down to the child's base personality on whether they will get along or not at any age. My kids are extremely close, but they do argue A LOT. They also get along really well despite all the arguing and totally opposite personalities. They will be the first to defend each other. They are 3 years and 7 months apart, but because of how their birthdays fall they are four grades apart which will work out great for paying for college. Right now DD is 16 and DS will be turning 13 next month. This is not what we planned, but it was what we got.

I think the most important thing is to encourage them to love each other no matter the age gap. I mean, when my son was born I would always make comments about how much he loved my daughter whenever he would grab her finger or laugh at her or follow her around the room with his eyes. I really played it up and I let her hold him almost whenever she wanted. And by the time he was old enough to understand what the words I love you meant, she was saying it to him all the time and he just naturally responded.

As for me, my oldest sister is 11 years older than me and my middle sister is 6 years older than me. I was never close to the eldest although in the last couple of years things have gotten better. I was close to my middle sister when we were younger, but we aren't really close now (though I am close with 3 of her children). My husband and his sister are 2 years apart and they fought a lot as kids but were also close and are very close now. I am closer to his sister than I am to either of mine.
guppy Says:
February 6th, 2013 at 12:23 pm 1360153413
1360153413

Thanks for the insight everyone. There were quite a few of you with larger age gaps between siblings. Like I said, my brother and I are 6 years apart and I've always enjoyed having an older brother and the age difference never bothered me. I think when you've never had it any other way it's hard to feel like it wasnt "normal" when it always felt like it was. Oh who knows...it'll all work out in the end, doesn't it always?
Nika Says:
February 6th, 2013 at 02:58 pm 1360162706
1360162706

We are both the only children. We are thinking about a second one. 4 years seems a good gap if you intend to help them with undergraduate education -- that way you won't have 2 kids in college at the same time.
guppy Says:
February 6th, 2013 at 07:40 pm 1360179617
1360179617

4 years sounds like a good gap considering my mother helps out. G would start pre-school so my mom wouldnt be pulling her hair out as much as if she had TWO kids ALL day. Of course that's something she'd be willing to do but I'd rather not put that stress on her. Plus the age gap gave us the time to get our finances in much better shape than it otherwise would've been.
pretty cheap jewelry Says:
February 8th, 2013 at 07:27 pm 1360351638
1360351638

the gender makes as much impact as age
we have a boy and a girl (now teens) exactly 2 years apart (yes, same birthday)

they do not do ANYTHING together socially
i fully assume they will be close in the future because we are a pretty supportive family all around

btw, I am an 'Honorary Mother of Twins' imo
ThriftoRama Says:
February 10th, 2013 at 03:44 pm 1360511068
1360511068

My sister and I are 5 years apart. We were friends when we were little, then split in as soon as she was about 12, and then didn't get along again until we were in our 20s. That's just a big gap developmentally when you are young.

My kids are 3 and 4, 19 months apart. We chose to have the second relatively quickly for several reasons. I wanted to be 35 or under when he was born, to avoid the high-risk pregnancy category. We also wanted to just jump in and do all the hard work of baby and toddlerhood all at once. We didn't like the idea of going through all that, sending one of to kindergarten, and then starting all over again. We wanted to condense those years and just get them over with and both off to school in a relatively close time together. We also really wanted them to be close emotionally and physically, rather than the age gap from my own childhood.

So far, it's worked out. The kids do not remember ever being without each other, and they play together all day. They fight, sure, but they have a built in best friend, and we like that.
Looking Forward Says:
February 10th, 2013 at 09:45 pm 1360532753
1360532753

My sister and I are just under 8 years apart. And my own children are over 8 years apart. We got pregnant when we felt the time was right for us. I like that we can spend very individualized time with each because they are into totally different things.
Jerry Says:
February 18th, 2013 at 04:40 am 1361162458
1361162458

Our daughters are five years apart, they are now 7 and 2. For a while, the difference would lead to some frustration for the older one, because she "wanted someone to PLAY with, and she's still too SMALL." But now the little one is becoming much more capable of simple games and they have a great time together. (When they aren't driving each other crazy, which also happens with some frequency.) I don't think there is a "right" or "wrong" time -- you do it when it works for you! There are benefits and drawbacks to any situation, and frankly it is just nice to have siblings. My wife was an only child, while I am the oldest of seven kids, and I now see how blessed I was to have some insurance of other kids around growing up. Never a dull moment!
Jerry
Mayara Says:
February 21st, 2013 at 07:54 am 1361433250
1361433250

Well my brother is 18 years older than me. My mother was 17 when she gave birth to my brother. She was 38 when she decided to have another child (Me) when I was younger..teenager years it felt weird, because everyone would think he's my father..but once I was in my 20's it was normal.. But my neice is younger than me 4 years so that's exciting!!!

(Note: If you were logged in, we could automatically fill in these fields for you.)

Name:	*
Email:	Will not be published.
	Subscribe: Notify me of additional comments to this entry.
URL:
Verification:	* Please spell out the number 4. [ Why? ]

vB Code: You can use these tags: [b] [i] [u] [url] [email]

a guppy and her money

Age difference between siblings

21 Responses to “Age difference between siblings”

Leave a Reply